Lately I have been trying to get back to reading IE forums and web sites, hoping something will click with me again. One of my favorites is from Linda Moran, whose book I read and liked. A few days ago she invited a hypnotherapist, Jennifer Poole, to the forum. She described what she does on a one-on-one basis, as well as her self-hypnosis/meditation CDs that she sells.I went to her web site (www.EFTHypnosis.com) and looked around, and then I did some general searches online about hypnosis. What I liked about Jennifer's work is that she isn't about dieting per se. What she recommends is for people to first use her CD Clearing Emotional Blocks for a month, then use the Intuitive Eating for Weight Release CD. This all ties in with the work I've done in the past, particularly Karen Koenig, who stresses that to find a healthy relationship with food, we must first have a healthy relationship with our emotions.
I wondered if I would be a good candidate for hypnosis, and I did find some interesting sites online that can help you determine if it might work for you (like this one). One of the articles I read said that if you can really lose yourself in a movie, that's a good sign. I have always been like that and it seems to get stronger the older I get. A few weeks ago I watched "No Country for Old Men" and it made me physically unwell dealing with the suspense and violence involved. I got anxious, my stomach was in knots, and I actually had to leave the room at one point. Also, when I write (which I have been doing regularly -- hooray for me), if I'm working on a very intense scene I actually place myself in the character's place and wind up feeling all the emotions to help myself fully describe what's going on. I always considered these things to mean I was a very empathic person, and apparently it means hypnosis might work for me.
I did some e-mailing on the forum and received replies from both Linda and Jennifer that I really appreciated. Having some bonus dollars racked up on my credit card, I cashed them in and ordered the two CDs. They arrived in the mail yesterday.
I told my one friend about this purchase (before I received the CDs) and her reaction wasn't the greatest; she wasn't mean about it, but she definitely seemed to think it was a silly idea. I know that hypnosis has this reputation as a parlor trick a form of entertainment or a scam, but I've always been intrigued by it. Ages ago I asked my therapist about it (because someone asked me about it and I wanted her opinion to give them) and she raved about the success she had with it in the scope of pain management.
Now that I've done the first CD two times (it's recommended to do it once a day for the first month), I can give my initial review of it. Hypnosis has this connotation that it takes over your mind and makes you do and believe crazy things (i.e., every time you hear the word "hello" you'll bark like a dog). It's not a magic spell. As far as this CD goes, it is definitely part meditation, part visualization, plus a nice dose of reinforcement and affirmation to boot.
For a long time I've been "shoulding" myself about meditation. I've read and heard about it in many different avenues, and it really seemed like something that would benefit me. I let myself get too stressed out and worked up about things, and I have trouble finding ways to relax and let go that don't involve food. I would tell myself I would start doing it, but then I wouldn't know where to begin and worry that I wouldn't do it "right" (yes, Ms. Perfectionist!). So, for that reason alone, this CD is good for me. It guides you through a relaxation process that aids you in ridding yourself of the annoyances and problems that are floating in your conscious mind at that point in time.
The messages in the CD really hit home for me. I've always been plagued with feelings of low self-worth, that I'm damaged in some essential way, that I'll never be good enough, and these are all addressed in a positive, affirming way. One of the most powerful for me was when she simply said "you are okay." Such a small thing when you look at it here, but wow did it affect me. The first time through I had these thoughts arise in me of, "really? I really am okay?" that caused this burning in my chest like the onset of crying, but it passed without me forcing it away. In my regular, uptight state I would have confronted these positive, self-loving statements with my usual cynical, self-defense mode of "yeah, right." But in that relaxed state I was actually able to listen and for a moment believe that it's really possible to feel okay about myself. The best part for me is that after these statements it is suggested to say the word "yes" in your mind to help in the acceptance of these new beliefs.
When it's over and I get up, I feel so calm and content. I don't know if it's the relaxation part of it or the positive messages coming at me, or a combination of the two. I'm excited to see what happens after a week, then the month. And of course I'm really curious to find out what the second CD is all about.
Do I think hypnosis is a magic pill? Of course not. Like any other tool I'm using, whether it's talk therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, medications or exercise, it only helps you when you use it. I'm sure like any of the other above mentioned methods, you can't just do it once or twice and expect to be cured forever. You only get a long-term benefit if you continue to do it in the long term. So, like everything else, the trick is to make the time and effort to make this an everyday part of my life. Because with every new tool I find, I seem to get a little bit better. Hopefully I'll soon have enough of an arsenal to really make some progress with this battle I've been waging with myself.
